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My Dear Godbrethren,

Please accept my most humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada, who continually indicates that He is the only ultimate shelter in this place, where there is danger even on the Royal roads.

Many of you may know me personally, some may not. I have recently been expressing my feelings about many of the problems that we all face during this era of trials and tribulation following the disappearance from our mundane vision of His Divine Grace A. C. Bhaktivedanta Swami, Srila Prabhupada, our beloved Spiritual Master. For the sake of not making this letter too voluminous or repetitive, I am assuming that most of the readers have read my paper, “Srila Prabhupada’s Perfect Plan”, as well as my letters directed to the residents of Saranagati Village and the GBC representative, Prithu dasa. These letters were penned after returning home from a weekend at Saranagati Village, which included my attendance at a meeting held primarily to discuss Jagadisa dasa’s departure. I have taken the liberty to be outspoken in my private and personal thoughts and opinions, which I pray do not shock or offend you.

Having written these papers and letters, and having shared in various correspondences with other devotees, I feel that I must now complete this writing process, which is directed primarily to Jagadisa dasa’s disciples and the community at Saranagati, but is also intended for the greater community of devotees. While certain particulars apply locally, I am stating my views to everyone. By everyone, I mean especially those who fall into the categories established, not by me but by my Godbrothers, of “we and they”: [we] direct diksa disciples of Srila Prabhupada (an endangered species soon to be extinct), and [they] those disciples who have taken diksa from one of my many eager Godbrothers. I refuse to make such a distinction, regardless of how tightly both the parties involved are locked onto their view point. In other words, I address every follower of Srila Prabhupada as my Godbrother or sister. I make no distinction. I would have preferred that all residents of Saranagati were invited to the evening get-together at Sriman Partha dasa’s asrama. I’m sure those who chose not to attend and those who were not invited would have learned a great deal.

I maintain this outlook because I strongly believe that this relationship between the so-called diksa guru and his uninformed disciple is an illusion [apara- attachment] and I therefore choose to act accordingly. I am not denying that a relationship exists. Obviously the emotional attachment is there, fixed in the heart and mind. My point is not that there isn’t a relationship of guru and his disciple, it is with regards to the degree of realization on the part of both individuals. In my opinion, these relationships, as they are manifested within ISKCON, do not meet the criteria of a bonafide diksa guru and his eternal disciple.

The Vaisnava sastra, the Spiritual Master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami, and the previous exalted authorities within our illustrious sampradaya, composed exclusively of maha-bhagavatas, have clearly described the prerequisite qualifications in terms of clearly manifest qualities for those exalted devotees taking on this responsibility of diksa guru, officially representing the sampradaya and Lord Sri Krsna. It is my imperfect analysis and my present opinion that those direct disciples of Srila Prabhupada that I have met or know of have not displayed these necessary spiritual standards. In fact, most of those who have taken on this service as diksa agree on this point. But they have gone dangerously far into the realm of rewriting shastra by redefining the definition of diksa, and have boldly come up with the new-age, modernized, de-mystified, uncertified diksa guru.

Granted, it presents a difficulty for one devotee to ascertain the level of advancement of another, especially when one is aspiring or claiming to be a qualified diksa, ready and willing to accept disciples of his own. This dilemma has always been a serious consideration for the great philosophers within our sampradaya, who have thoroughly studied the science of Krsna consciousness. The greatest philosopher in our sampradaya, Jiva Goswami, has therefore decreed that this order and/or blessing to enter into the sacred realm of giving diksa, initiating disciples into the sampradaya, cannot be authorized by an ecclesiastical body but only through the heart of the prospective diksa guru by his own qualified Spiritual Master. This phenomena is obviously difficult to determine, especially by some external personality or group of “judges”, which is precisely why such an administrative body’s approval, vote, or non-objection ruling is rejected by the Acaryas as the determining factor.

This is why Srila Prabhupada simply stated, “On my order” when pressed by his disciples to give them His blessing to accept their own disciples after His departure. We can read that Srila Prabhupada was approached many times by senior members of the Gaudiya Matha after leaving His family, when He was living alone in Vrindabin under very austere conditions, writing, preaching, chanting, etc. They wanted Him to accept sannyasi because he was obviously more than qualified. However, Srila Prabhupada declined, until His Spiritual Master, Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati, appeared to Him within His heart and ordered Him to take to the renounced order of life so as to further assist in the preaching work. We can also assume that Srila Prabhupada declared Himself to be the next Acarya and assumed the title “Prabhupada”, which was a title reserved within the Gaudiya Matha for their Founder/Acarya, Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Prabhupada, because His guru Maharaj appeared to Him and declared Him to be the next Acarya. This is the process.

This is also why everyone is still in confusion as to why Srila Prabhupada did not appoint anyone to become Acarya or diksa guru after His entering into maha samadhi. As evidenced in the “appointment tape”, Srila Prabhupada appears to have been intentionally vague on this point, even when repeatedly pressed for details by his disciples. He followed exactly the same procedure as His Guru Maharaj did before him. In both cases the senior disciples, who obviously had great hopes of inheriting this position and title, were very disappointed and in both cases they simply could not resist, and took these positions without the authorization and/or blessings of their guru. And they suffered the consequences.

The great dilemma is there for us to work out: how do we go about maintaining the asrama, or as it is known today, “the institution”, of the Acarya after His manifested presence is no long visible to our mundane vision? This is perhaps the great gift Srila Prabhupada left us by not explicitly stating His wishes on the issue of initiation...we are forced to think deeply and discuss, read our Spiritual Master’s books, and search our hearts for the truth. The open secret is found in Srila Prabhupada’s famous phrase, “the test of how much you love me is whether you will cooperate together to maintain what I have given you”. This is a tall order, a great challenge, a next to impossible task considering how neophyte His disciples are...considering we are all heavily influenced by Kali Yuga, we were barely cooperating when Srila Prabhupada was here to supervise us, we are addicted to the modes of passion and ignorance, we all have such impious births...we could go on indefinitely listing all our disqualifications. But we have as our Founder/Acarya the greatest preacher of Krsna consciousness the planet has seen since the advent of Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu. We have the blessing of the whole sampradaya, we have the prediction of Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu that this chanting and philosophy will be heard in every town and village, we have the literatures left us by Srila Prabhupada, and we have what is remaining of His preaching/asrama temples. We have the memories and experience of what it was like when Srila Prabhupada was present to oversee the development of His preaching mission, ISKCON. What is standing in our way? Why can’t we cooperate? Where are all the trained up preachers? Why aren’t they engaged with the same enthusiasm as before?

My analysis is that this mistake of trying to be the Acarya rather than simply following the Acarya is the root cause. Why are we in the material world and not in the spiritual world with our beloved Lord? Because we want to be Krsna rather than serve Krsna. Simple! Too simple, but so true. We all have to overcome our deep rooted envy of Krsna and His direct emissary, Srila Prabhupada. We all have this sick desire to be the Supreme Enjoyer, the Supreme Controller, the great Acarya. We have the hardest time being a humble servant, of the servant, of the servant. We can all look displeasingly at our so-called older, advanced Godbrothers who have grabbed the titles, the positions, and the prestige. And they can glare back saying, “you are just envious, we deserve it more than you.” The problem is that they’re right - we are envious, but we are all thieves fighting over stolen goods. These items that we are fighting over were given not to us fools, but to Srila Prabhupada to use in Lord Krsna Caitanya Mahaprabhu’s service: the manpower, the money, the properties, the copyrights to the books, the BBT, etc.

The disciple who feels he is deserving all these things, please step forward and claim them as your own! Who amongst us feels that it was because of their great devotional activities that these things were given exclusively to them to use as they see fit? It is sad to say that there are takers to this challenge, there are false claimants, there are those who would kick out their fellow Godbrothers and sisters who challenge their right to this bounty, hoarding these gifts from the spiritual realm and calling them their own. As a result, those innocent souls who are caught in the middle of this battlefield, namely the simple sincere servants who are now being fought over like cattle or chattel, or women, or land, these so-called disciples of this guru or that guru, they are suffering and crying in disappointment. These individuals came to help Srila Prabhupada, their time and money was given to assist in Srila Prabhupada’s mission, not for some foolish pretender to use as he sees fit while he mouths the mantra “It’s for Srila Prabhupada, Prabhu”.

We have all been witness to such gross exploitive abuse of power, money, men and women and children in the hands of completely incompetent, intoxicated fools for so long, that we are all so accustomed to it we just shrug it off or look the other way. Worse still, we deny that it is even happening at all. Wake up, my dear friends! It is happening, and it is you who are being cheated out of the greatest gift you can possibly be given in millions of lifetimes - a chance to be part of the sankirtan movement of Caitanya Mahaprabhu, personally supervised and set-up by one of Nityananda Prabhu’s close associates, namely Srila Prabhupada. Why is everyone standing around with their hands in their pockets and in some cases, in their bead bags, wondering, “what is going on here...maybe someone else will figure it out”.

It’s simple! It’s obvious! You are being robbed, cheated, and taken for fools and no one is going to fight for you. Why are we so spaced out, such wimps, such gullible slows? Because we are not in the fighting/preaching spirit exemplified by Srila Prabhupada. We are not interested anymore in using all these valuable gifts in Krsna’s service or even for our own spiritual well being. We are not regularly and intensely reading Srila Prabhupada’s books. We are not into distributing these books to the suffering humanity. We are not seeing the importance of having a beautiful center in the middle of an important city equipped with deities, restaurant, asramas etc. For the most part we are allowing a few pretender impotent diksas to occupy these places and set themselves up in their own little mathas, where they can collect just enough money by begging from the kanistas so that they live comfortably with a few disciples surrounding them. In too many places, especially here in the North America, there is no preaching spirit, no results, and of course no Godbrothers as competition. And even worse, no Srila Prabhupada to compete with, “he is dead and gone. We are in charge now.”

We have been cheated and robbed, but we have been unwilling to face the fact that we allowed these precious things to be stolen. We did not fiercely guard these jewels. We allowed them to be stolen to the degree that we didn’t really want them anyhow. We don’t have to surrender to the orders of the spiritual master when our Godbrothers make things too difficult for us to do our service peacefully. Challenging the difficulties, righting the wrongs, requires that we be fully committed to wanting these things. Once the obstacles are removed, how will we justify not fully engaging once again in service to Srila Prabhupada’s mission? In the same way, those who knowingly accept unqualified diksa gurus are cheated out of the direct shelter of the pure devotee, Srila Prabhupada. How many have accepted second-best because second best is what they really desired? Why jump into the fire of purification when we can simply warm our hands over the coals?

And where are the GBC who should guide us in these difficult circumstances? There are no GBC, there are only carbon copies of the local representatives. They all have their own mathas, their own territory, disciples, problems, etc. They are all in agreement, so they all fly the ISKCON banner because it helps give them credibility. But they are all separate...there is no ISKCON, there is no bonafide GBC! Yes, there are those who sincerely think they are doing their best, but this is the same sentiment expressed by the diksa guru who says he is trying, he loves his disciples and they love him. So, the world is full of people who love their children, their wives, their country, and even humanity. But are they free from illusion? No, so they are making mistakes and they are suffering, along with their loved ones.

I will not go into undue detail by developing my justifications for speaking the truth as I see it. I do not find it an offensive action to present my controversial thoughts to those of you within the Vaisnava community who have for years been protected by a perpetual gag order coming from the leadership of ISKCON. This bogus ruse that we might “disturb the minds and hearts of the poor disciples” with THE TRUTH is so offensive, and so effectively used to justify acts of secrecy, cover-ups, censorship and lies. This has been done to such an embarrassing and disgusting extent that it has now become obvious to everyone, especially those for whom this policy was there to supposedly protect, namely the poor innocent disciples, that they have something to hide. Wake up! This policy was not intended to protect them at all. It was intended from the beginning to protect the pretenders disguised as diksas, who didn’t want to expose the truth concerning their lack of qualifications to be accepting worship by their many disciples. These disciples have been deceived into thinking they are bonafide diksa disciples of a qualified diksa guru. This has been the underlying motive behind the policy from day one, ever since the takeover of ISKCON by these pretender diksa gurus.

As I note in my Perfect Plan paper, the Seattle temple in 1978 was the first of many temples to be sacrificed as a direct result of the implementation of this cover-up policy. The Seattle devotees were simply the first victims out of many thousands since. This same policy is alive and well within ISKCON today. The GBC reserves the right to deem some matters so sensitive as to justify a cover-up or an outright lie. The justification for these decisions to censure vital information inevitably stems from some diksa guru’s falldowns being covered up so as to protect his disciples.

I recently spoke on the phone to one of the few surviving GBC’s who have been able to stay in power and still be an outspoken critic of the mood I have just spoken of. Yasomatinandana dasa Adhikary, from Gujurat, India, has written some brilliant papers which will soon be posted on our website. He penned an expert paper exposing the most recent maha philosophical deviations promoted and participated in by many of the senior leaders of ISKCON, commonly known as “the Gopi Bhava Club”. We are publishing an extensive collection of papers with all the details on this aparadha shortly. You will be surprised by which Big devotees were involved. During our phone conversation, I asked Yasomatinandana dasa why we haven’t heard any detailed philosophical explanations by the so-called reformed deviators, explaining to us why and how they could have fallen prey to this tendency to jump over the Spiritual Master’s head while prematurely trying to enter into prema bhakti. Yaso replied, “are you kidding, what would their disciples think of them if they confessed to be in so much illusion as to have committed such an aparadha that it could be classified as an elephant offense?” The GBC met for two weeks discussing this matter, and passed some strong resolutions, but they were all censored. We are trying to get the exact wording, but the point has become common knowledge.

The rumor mill in ISKCON is notorious, with many of the “secrets” being given directly by those on the inside, who know in their hearts that something is seriously wrong, but are not willing to confront the GBC head-on and risk losing their service. So what can be accomplished by this so-called secrecy, accept to further promote distrust in our authorities by adding grist to the rumor mill? One of the most recent, and amazingly blatant forms of ISKCON censorship is their COM Internet site. But of course, the most damaging censorship of all comes when those of us who dare to challenge, with verifiable facts and sastra in hand, get through to one of the diksa guru’s disciples. And that inquiring disciple’s questions are inevitably met by the response, “that prabhu is just an offensive fault-finder. You are not permitted to hear from him.” End of subject.

We observed that Srila Prabhuapda, the undisputed perfect Acarya, would occasionally instruct that the misconduct of certain senior disciples be keep secret so as to encourage this dear disciple to return without a dark cloud over his head. This rare occasion has been used as a primary excuse for implementing the now strictly followed GBC censorship policy. Circumstances are vastly different now than when Srila Prabhupada was present, because these senior men have assumed positions close to that of the real Acarya. Srila Prabhupada was so open in His activities and speech that devotees were actually allowed to follow Him everywhere with a tape recorder, cameras flashing, and His private letters being circulated. He had nothing to hide. Srila Prabhupada accepted the responsibility of being a public figure. He did not have a private life.

How have we suffered as a result of this censorship policy? There is no way to calculate the damage. I ask you, how can the suppression of truth be beneficial to anyone, at any time, under any circumstance? Do you wish to live in an open society or a closed, authoritarian society? What do pure devotees have to hide, anyway? How can we pretend not to know that one who has to hide his impurities is not qualified to be giving diksa or to sit on the GBC?

Bhagavad-Gita 10.4-5, Purport:

“Satyam, truthfulness, means that facts should be presented as they are, for the benefit of others. Facts should not be misrepresented. According to social conventions, it is said that one can speak the truth only when it is palatable to others. But that is not truthfulness. The truth should be spoken in a straightforward way, so that others will understand actually what the facts are. If a man is a thief and if people are warned that he is a thief, that is truth. Although sometimes the truth is unpalatable, one should not refrain from speaking it. Truthfulness demands that the facts be presented as they are for the benefit of others. That is the definition of truth”.

Throughout our scriptures there are so many examples of disciples and followers questioning their authorities. Even the Yamadhutas questioned Lord Yamaraj after they had been challenged by the Visnudutas. The activities of even the great Mahajanas, who temporarily forgot their eternal positions and therefore acted foolishly toward Krsna or His pure representative like Narada Muni, are reported. Lord Indra, Lord Brahma, Bhismadeva, etc., did they order the scriptures banned? Srila Prabhupada reported on the deviations of his Godbrothers within the pages of the Caitanya Caritamrita. All these truthful pastimes are there so as to teach a lesson for those aspiring, struggling devotees following in their footsteps in the future, so that we can learn by example and therefore not have to repeat the same mistakes.

I have been accused by some of digging up the past like a grave robber. This accusation might have some validity if we had learned something from the past mistakes. I am only compelled to bring up all these past circumstances because we continue to make the same mistakes time after time. Why are we ignoring the obvious lessons that have been put in our face by the Lord? Why are so many of our friends being sacrificed and suffering? The most recent example is Jagadisa dasa. Bahudak, Nandikesvara, Visvakarma, Gokularanjnana...the list goes on endlessly. These devotees were/are my comrades in the service of Srila Prabhupada. They are all victims of this lying propaganda and are no longer participating. What an incomprehensible waste!

Why is this nonsense continuing? Because of strong material attachment, that’s why! In other words, they have become fearful that if the truth be known they may lose what they have become so attached to: power, prestige, adoration and distinction. In the purport to Bhagavad-Gita 16.3, Srila Prabhupada states:

“For a sannyasi, the first qualification should be fearlessness. Because a sannyasi has to be alone without any support or guarantee of support, he has simply to depend on the mercy of the Supreme Personality of Godhead.”

In all honesty, the only reason I can speak out this way is because Krsna has mercifully, forcefully taken away from me everything that I was once attached to but which, in reality, was inexorably pulling me down into my desires for false prestige and power. My present position is such that I personally have nothing to lose. I am by no means a great renunciate. I fortunately don’t have children to feed or a job that I have to go to everyday. Now I have no power or prestige, but instead have the loving support of my wife, an increased love for my exalted Spiritual Master, and the freedom to speak what I believe is the truth. The chances of reinstating myself back into my previous comfortable circumstances within ISKCON are practically nil. Of course, the more I analyze the condition of the society, the less I hanker to return. The spiritual risk is certainly there, committing offenses to the venerable Vaisnavas is a big consideration. But then, so is remaining silent. I feel that I am honestly saying what many of my friends, for whatever reasons, cannot say publicly themselves, but feel and occasionally express in private.

I addressed the censorship issue because it has been one of the primary detrimental spin-offs from the diksa guru controversy that has been raging through the mission for 20 years. If the facts are truthfully presented to intelligent, thoughtful devotees, regardless of their circumstances or position on this guru issue, then they can at least make their own decisions and become responsible for the repercussions. There has been a lot of discussion around the worldwide community of Vaisnavas surrounding this sensitive issue of censorship. Following is an excerpt from my friend Kundali dasa’s book, “Our Mission. He has approached this issue from a sociological standpoint, but the conclusions are the same. While I do not agree with certain points of philosophy presented by Kundali dasa in “Our Mission”, I think the following passage on censorship is true:

“In other words, the justification for book banning and censorship in all forms is for maintaining stability, security; but love, or Krsna consciousness is not based on security—it is based on vulnerability. Love and trust become stifled in an authoritarian society. Administrative force and oppression keep love and trust from flowering. As Mr. Mill said, the push and pull of lively debate is part of the process of discovering truth. Therefore Krsrnadasa Kaviraja Gosvami advises us not to avoid controversy for it "strengthens the mind and thus one's mind becomes attached to Krsna." He advises us not to avoid controversy, but in our society we use the label “Controversial" as a black mark against someone who stands for an unpopular idea. Historically, however, it has been shown that new ideas or new ways of looking at things are always unpopular at first. Often the same unpopular idea becomes the accepted norm.

“Censorship is a veiled cynical response to the above dynamic, an attempt to short-circuit it by gagging the opposition. Why is it cynicism? Because censorship in essence declares the reading public to be gullible fools or slaves. But what could be the true reason for such a cynical response? At the heart of cynicism lies fear, paranoia, prejudice and cowardice. Cynicism does not require courage. It is the height of cowardice. Innocence and open-heartedness, love and trust, those things require courage.

“When one appreciates that censorship is a form of cynicism, and that cynicism is cowardice one understands that fear lies behind censorship. Cowards fear freedom of expression in the marketplace of ideas. Persons secure in their own conviction or realization have no such fear. Lord Caitanya listened to Sarvabhauma Bhattacarya for seven days, showing that the art of persuasion involves letting the other side speak from the heart. This dynamic of innocence and open-heartedness is essential to individuals growth and it is only possible in an open society, Seek first to understand, then be understood.

“These reasons are sufficient to show that ISKCON should be an open society. If we wish to take openness seriously we must devise rules and procedures deliberately tilted in favor of openness to counter leadership's inherent tendency for censorship and to counter the possibility of corruption, tyranny, ineptitude, and secrecy, which power can confer in an authoritarian system. In an open society, in other words, there is scope for accountability. This openness is especially vital to us who claim to be Rupanugas whose ultimate aim is raganuga bhakti. Raganuga means openness, otherwise, how can loving exchanges take place? Rules are not ends in themselves but guidelines for us to become qualified recipients of love of Krsna.

“In a closed society there is no chance of such mechanisms working smoothly, because the individual does not have the right to speak, to take stands, to demand to be heard. He has no forum to participate. In addition, there is no mechanism to protect the individual from abuse of power and misuse of justice. Change is only possible by crisis—by sheer force of numbers coercing change after a long period of pressure build-up reaches a state of critical mass. Such a method always gives rise to periods of instability, which could have been easily, avoided in the first place by openness.

“To end this section it must be emphasized that openness does not encourage rampant speculation, but the freedom to discuss philosophical questions based on sastra, to question institutional policy and dynamics, and to have the holder of even the most unpopular or minority view treated with respect—if for nothing else but the courage to think independently of the herd.”

ISKCON has put a lot of initial responsibility on the bhakta to ascertain the level of each and every guru who has been authorized to accept diksa disciples. I will refer you to a reply that I wrote to Vipramukhya Swami’s article entitled, “Now That I’m Chanting 16 rounds, What’s next?”, in which I challenged his (the GBC’s) position. This paper is found in the VADA section of the website. The truth is that there is no one who can truly say without a doubt, who is absolutely correct in all circumstances, other than Srila Prabhupada. As Srila Prabhupada has left copious volumes of realizations on every subject imaginably important for any aspiring devotee, there is no excuse for being ignorant or uninformed. Until such time as one is thoroughly conversant in understanding Srila Prabhupada’s teachings one is undoubtedly in a dangerous situation. This was even the case when Srila Prabhupada was physically on the planet. We were making innumerable mistakes that appeared to be unbeknownst to Srila Prabhupada, but if things got really out of control He was there to stop the nonsense and put things right. Srila Prabhupada knew that it was not possible to stay long enough to insure that we all had a strong grasp on the philosophy, and could protect ourselves from the many trials and tribulations that lay ahead for the disciples He loved and felt responsible for. Therefore, He stressed the writing and printing of his personal ecstasies so we would not be alone or abandoned. Those who have taken shelter of the Book- Bhagavat are protected. Srila Prabhupada is always there to give us advice, to soothe our weary souls.

The importance of fulfilling our responsibilities to our Spiritual Master, whether we see Him as our diksa or siksa guru, is unavoidable and essential. We can take solace in the fact that within our sampradaya there are many examples where the relationship with the siksa guru is of more significance to the devotee than his relationship with the diksa guru. My advice is to wait cautiously and patiently for the truth to be revealed to the community of Vaisnavas. In the meantime, we must also stay thoroughly informed on all the arguments and discussions taking place. We must inquire from whomever is sincerely making an educated proposition or opinion, to the point where we understand to the height of our realizations. Then we can research Srila Prabhupada’s books, discuss it amongst those devotees that we trust are not questionably motivated, who know and love us. I have found that it is important to make our feelings, ideas and opinions know to the sadhus we can take shelter of, and whose thoughts and input we value. We must be prepared to explain our positions, accept criticism, and at the same time be ready to stand up and speak when we disagree or something doesn’t sit right for us.

My suggestion for those of you who happen to be in a diksa relationship with someone other than Srila Prabhupada is that you can and should direct your prayers to Srila Prabhupada. You are not obliged to have to go through the diksa to get to Srila Prabhupada. This is, of course, controversial, but I stand by this opinion. The new-age diksas have publicly admitted that they are not liberated, therefore they are not transparent via mediums to Srila Prabhupada. As their fallibility is exposed more and more, they are coming closer to the siksa conception of a guru, or even the Rtvik idea. They are THEMSELVES suggesting that their disciples take shelter of Srila Prabhupada rather than of them, although they are not ready to admit their false claim to power, or relinquish the prestige and position that goes along with being a diksa. This fact is very telling and deserves our meditation. I predict that the situation will come to a point where they will, by the natural unfolding of events, be forced to face even this painful reality.

In the meantime, the disciples must prepare themselves for whatever results can be expected someday, and the fact that they may have to make a very painful choice. To the degree that they have neglected to prepare themselves, they will suffer the pain of indecision and bewilderment. There have been many in the past that have been tested. Jayatirtha’s disciples were tested when he requested them to join him. There are other examples that I’m sure you are aware of. At least in Jagadisa dasa’s case he admitted he was unqualified and didn’t try to take anyone along, with one exception.

The saying, “make the best of a bad bargain” certainly applies to the present circumstances, but we must remain humble and think that by the mercy of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, we are really suffering far less than we deserve. We all have Srila Prabhupada, therefore we are all self-sufficient. It would be much nicer not to have to think about or deal with these matters, just go out and preach, chant, dance, and take prasadam. But we cannot wish these dilemmas away, nor can we deny that they exist. Just like old age, we can only prepare ourselves now and not wait until it is so much more difficult.

I have made available as much information as I can afford to put up on the website. We have stacks of very important documents that need to be posted, but time and financial restraints keep us from moving as quickly as we’d like. Anyone can contact us by e-mail, phone or regular mail, as noted below. If anyone wishes to visit they are very welcome. We have modest but reasonable facility and encourage your visits. If someone would like to help in any way possible - financially, transcribing audio/video tapes, HTML formatting, scanning, artwork, etc., there is always much to do.

To any whom I have offended, I beg your forgiveness and understanding.

I remain your servant, at the lotus feet of our eternal Spiritual Master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada,

Rocana dasa
November 19, 1996

Rocana dasa,
P.O. Box 62,
Gabriola, BC
(604) 247-2019
email: rocana@harekrsna.com